July 2010


And now another installment of “WTF Japan?!?

Dear Japan, you’re doing it wrong.

WTF Japan?!?

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Want to know why bears are awesome? Fuck you that’s why. BEARS

I’m going to yoga soon so I don’t have time to give my two-cents on the Conservative government’s move to make the census voluntary which essentially completely defeats the point of a census…

And now I’ll finish up with one of my many transit observations:

I sit in a breezy bus shelter on Sargeant Avenue. Across the street is a restaurant painted in peeling green and yellow paint. Above it’s large dirty windows a sign is perched reading “Cookatoo’s; World’s Finest Recipes”. I have my doubts.

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Today is a good day. Why you might ask? Well my powerful and attractive friends today was my first class of hot yoga in which I didn’t get dizzy or have to leave. I sweat my ass off and made it through all 90 minutes of postures. To make this monumental accomplishment that much sweater sweeter I  did it at 9:30 am after a 2 mile run! I feel great! If only my lesbian life partner was around, I feel so charming, funny, and attractive right now.

What could make this moment even better? I’m glad you asked because here’s a porcupine named “Stinkers”

My heart just melted and ran down my cheeks in tears of joy.

I’m hoping to have a busy night tomorrow starting with refreshments and entertainment at Old Market Square for Fringefest in the afternoon; dinner downtown at a newly opened classy looking restraunt; and then finishing with a walk down to lo pub to catch Ohbijou and Imaginary Cities. This is good because Ohbijou are awesome, (dare I say magical?) live. Imaginary Cities are one of the most exciting new Winnipeg bands.

Gender games are fun.

“She texted me back ‘yes’.”

Stay fit and have fun readers!

Now another installment of my ongoing series: “WTF Japan?!?

They have a bad case of diarrhea.

WTF Japan?!?

Sorry for being so painfully boring lately…this post will probably be just as bad. Here’s 10 new things in my life:

1)I like my youth home job so far.

2)I want to see “Inception“. You should too.

3)Fringefest is this week. I’m looking forward to moving a little bit closer to my pretentious asshole ideal.

4)I started hot yoga this week. I really enjoyed it but underestimated the intensity…even though Kristian warned me I was doing just that. About half way through I started to get dizzy and tried to leave instead of just laying down; not the best idea I’ve ever had considering it ended with me walking into a wall.

5)My brother found an apartment on River. I’m happy for him and also jealous of his superior location, here’s hoping he has rage-fucking neighbors.

6)I’m getting fat again. Yoga this is where you come in.

7)Pineapple.

8)I can’t drink anymore. Last week I threw up after drinking for less than two hours.

9)Toki has taken up residence in my land-fill/closet. I might be on “Hoarders” soon….hopefully not the one with the dead flat cats…

10) I’ve taken to writing transit commentary. Here’s a gem from today:

Old man, your mouth is open. Why is your mouth open?

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Now just a little auditif petit mort:

Nael Naim’s “Toxic”

He is trying to break your heart. Sparklehorse’s “Eyepennies

Educate yourself! One is the loneliest number.

If you ask me this looks like the work of Satan, not God…

Anyways….I’m sitting on my patio enjoying the non-sun and somewhat creepily watching my hippie neighbors clean their yard. Oh I’ve also finally found a steady source of income so that’s pretty exciting. I can’t tell you how much of a relief it is to know that there’s more money coming in than out. In upsetting news I’ve gained 5 lbs. I know it makes me come off as a dramatic queen but it somehow looks like 15. Plus it’s completely centered in my gut and jowles. Yeah that’s right I said, gut and jowles. Doesn’t that bring the sexiest images to mind? Mmmm. Ah hem, anyways. I’ve decided to start carrying a pocket-sized notebook with me to write short commentary on interesting people I see while riding/waiting for transit….OMG TOKI IS ON OUR FUCKING ROOF. BRB.……ok he’s down. That was impressive, apparently our cat is spider-man.

Want Sara from Tegan and Sara to teach you “Walk With the Ghost”? Of course you do.

Is anyone else having problems with Flash plugins? Is this a Windows 7 thing? A Firefox thing? Just my computer? Danielle I want answers now!

Here’s two songs/bands you should listen to:

Bent Elephants “Sask. Pool”

Jon McKiel “War on You”

Ohbijou are playing the lo next week. If I don’t work that night I would really like to go. I need to talk Kristian or Jamie into coming. If you forgot about them here’s their CBC page. Yes it is magic elf and sparkle music, but it’s also totally awesome. Plus they string together some of the best swoon kissing music around.

Today my existence became a little bit sadder when I realized I’ll never be as fulfilled as this man’s experience of a double rainbow. Wait for it…

Also, I will never know the joy of a pony sized slug ride.

I haven’t updated this place in awhile. My apologies to all 4 of my readers. I’m now starting work at a home which has a high aggression resident. Joy. Oh there’s also problems with nudity, although really if I could get away with it (and not be embarrassed by my flabby body) I’d be chilling naked on the couch too. Patti, Kristine, Kristian, and I are going out for supper/drinks in an hour or so. This is exciting because I haven’t seen Patti or Kristine in what feels like forever. I just have one question, why is Kristine not at Countryfest with a pocket full of Rohypnol? Keith “Pretty Hair” Urban is playing is he not? Don’t worry about Kidman, you could take that bitch easy-peasy and still have time for lemon squeezy.

You come for speedos, but stay for the head injury…


Meanwhile in Japan…

Stop it. Just stop.